Howard Anthony Graves, Jr

November 13, 1943 - August 27, 2021

Howard Anthony Graves, Jr. of Cape Coral, Florida passed away peacefully on August 27, 2021 with his son by his side.  A proud “Hooker”, Howie was born in Red Hook, Brooklyn on November 13, 1943 to Howard Anthony Graves, Sr. and Anna Graves (nee Cognato).  He is predeceased by both of his parents and his younger sister, Anna.

Howie was a loving father to Gregory and his wife Andrea.  He also leaves behind his daughter, Heather Green and her wife Melody.  Howie’s most treasured role was doting grandfather to his three adoring grandchildren Carter, Reagan and Jameson.  Although at a distance, Howie never missed an important milestone in his grandchildren’s lives.  He could often be found playing with them on the floor, spoiling them or trying to sneak them sweets. Howie also leaves behind his devoted long-time partner, Vivian Maher, whom he cherished deeply as well as countless cousins, aunts, uncles and friends.

Howie was an Army Reservist before proudly serving with the New York City Police Department for 20 years. Following his retirement, he relocated to Florida, where he worked for the Cape Coral School District.  He was also a long time member of the Cape Coral Retired Police Association aka the Cop Shop. He was always willing to lend a helping hand where he could.   Howie was an avid golfer and loved spending his free time on the course.  

A true gentleman in every sense of the word, Howie’s smile and caring nature will not be forgotten. Howie will be sorely missed by all who knew him; from those closest to him to the businesses he frequented.  His memory will live on through those he left behind.

Howie’s life will be celebrated with a funeral mass at St. Andrew’s Church, 2628 Del Prado Blvd. South, Cape Coral, on Friday, September 17, 2021 at noon.  Interment will be held at St. Charles Cemetery, 2015 Wellwood Avenue, Farmingdale, NY on Friday, October 22, 2021 at 11:30 AM.  

In lieu of flowers, donations can be made in Howie’s name to The St. Jude’s Children’s Hospital.

Mullins Memorial Funeral Home & Cremation Service, Cape Coral, is entrusted with final care.


  1. Connie Nortz Sep 3, 2021 at 8:26 pm

    RIP my special friend, I will always remember all the nice things you did for me, my name you gave me will a.ways bring a smile to me and will remember when you gave it to me.

  2. Elizabeth Savarese Whitton Sep 4, 2021 at 12:34 am

    I hadn’t seen Howie In 50 years when we met at a musical event. He recognized me and immediately stood up to give me his seat in the crowded venue I saw him a few times later on and he was always a gentleman in every sense of the word. I knew him in the Hook because he was friends with my cousins, Corky and Johnny Valente.

  3. Lou Hidalgo Sep 4, 2021 at 1:43 am

    Rest eternally in peace Howie 🙏🏻

  4. Kin Sep 4, 2021 at 2:31 pm

    Howie, hope you and our Sunday golfing nuts up there are playing well. Hit them straight and into the bar on the 19th hole. Kin

  5. Harry Boyle Sep 4, 2021 at 2:43 pm

    He was my first friend. We played ball ,were in the Visitation Band together ,as well as the Alter Boys for the church too. A really sweet guy. I’m going to miss him. R.I.P. Howie

  6. Vivian Maher Sep 4, 2021 at 10:01 pm

    I have known Howie for over 20 years. Except for being a little older, Howie’s personality and love for people never changed. He was a “people” person. You couldn’t pass without a greeting from him or even a short conversation (whether he knew you or not). Howie had a great sense of humor and was always making people laugh. His motto was “What’s life if you don’t laugh!” Howie loved his grandchildren and enjoyed his visit with them. He will be greatly missed by all, including my family who considered Howie part of our family. I am grateful for all the time Howie and I shared together. Howie, you will be forever in my heart and prayers. Love you. Rest in peace.

  7. Mary, Pedro & Isabel Sep 5, 2021 at 6:07 pm

    We are so sorry for your loss, and miss Howie tremendously. Living across the street, we got to know Howie quite well. He always had a smile and lent a helping hand,even taking our trash cans in on a regular basis. He never passed up an opportunity to make us laugh,and enjoyed political bantering. He loved our little dog Tucker and always went out of his way to stop and pet him. Howie is dearly missed and you all remain in our thoughts and prayers.

  8. John Ryan Sep 5, 2021 at 7:14 pm

    John & Eileen Ryan
    September 5, 2021

    I first knew Howie from Red Hook,
    NY, where we both grew up. We also meet at the AL Post in Fort Myers where Harry Boyle was playing that night. Harry visited me in the Village’s and we enjoyed playing golf. He will be solely missed by ALL RIP

  9. Greg and Noreen Laplaca Sep 16, 2021 at 7:16 pm

    Always looked foward to our weekly Wednesday nights going out for dinner.
    Good food and great conversations along with a lot of laughs will always be part of so many good times and memories. Lot’s of great golfing memories as well. Howie you were always a gentleman and good friend.
    You will always be in our hearts . Hi

  10. Carole Tavolacci May 31, 2022 at 12:53 pm

    A great co-worker in Lee county school district. You always could count on Howie. You were always safe with Howie. Great sense of humor, which as a fellow New Yorker I could appreciate. Rest in eternal life and peace. Thank you for your patriotic spirit and service. You were missed.

  11. Carrie Painter 602-931-0358 Jun 22, 2022 at 11:59 pm

    Just saw the Fathers Day post on Facebook about Howie. I had met Howie thru John Mascarelli my husband, while we lived and visited Cape Coral for many years back in 2007-2015. My John passed away 11-21-2019 here in Mesa, Arizona. Howie and John were related but don’t remember how. My condolences to his family and to Vivian.

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